Blurry Pictures

Getting one kid to hold still and smile in the right spot for a cute picture is no problemo, but two kids is another matter altogether.

And so the stage of blurry, non-looking pictures has begun...but they are still cute!

Remember When...

It's so crazy that such a vital phase of our life is nearly over. I mean, Colorado has given us so much! A Ph.D., two Master's Degree's, 3 jobs, three residences, our first home, countless friends, innumerable memories, and of course, our two beautiful children and their birth-families.

And now we are 21 days away from leaving it all behind us for a new adventure in New Mexico.

So, come and reminisce with Nick and I as we share some, perhaps, lesser known memories.

Remember when...

We moved to Colorado and didn't have a couch so we walked around AFW (aka The Mecca) and sat in these little beauties for a couple weeks until our couches were delivered (and we had a landline)?

We took that hike up the flatirons but only got halfway before your pants ripped in a very inconvenient place and then I had to hike down in front of you so other hikers wouldn't see...anything?

Someone spray painted this lovely message on the garages outside our window (and when this was our view)?

Our rice cooker lid shattered and it looked happy about it?

We played racquetball all the time and you gave me a black eye (and when I had acne so bad I looked like I had chicken pox)?

I took random, "useless" pictures of you...a lot?

We were totally captivated with the Colorado sky (and still are)?

 We went to those Valentine's Dances for grown ups?

We went to like 5 Rockies games in one summer while I was in grad school and we thought a dude with crazy earrings in was worth a picture (and now it's not even worth a second glance)?

We had two cars and they both broke down the same week we moved?

I somehow convinced you to use your finger to desecrate one of our nation's most honored landmarks and presidents?

I used to work with these kiddos everyday?

My making descent food was actually worthy of a picture because it happened so infrequently?

I was a woman of business and wore clothes like this?

 

Our patio looked like this?

You had to do those shifts at the observatory that were so fun and so cold?

We met Gertrude and Helga?

Our new fridge broke and we had to buy a new one only to find out the old one's problem was that the door didn't close all the way (gosh I loved that fridge)?

All our kid stuff fit into one tiny corner (and we owned and had space for a desk)?

Hope you all enjoyed that waltz down memory lane with us -- I know I did! Have I mentioned we are really going to miss Colorado??

We Love to Laugh!

This is my new favorite activity with my boy! What a cute, goofy laugh he has!

My "Do Do" List

If you read yesterday's post, you see that our family has A LOT going on, and so there's A LOT going on outside of our immediate family/vicinity that we simply cannot do. We've really had to learn to say "I'm so sorry, but I just can't" and "We really wish we could be there, but it's just not going to work out."

Seriously, it's been a bit of a drag.

That's why when my friend Megan reminded me that I have so many opportunities that are available to me and I need to take advantage of them! It's my responsibility to share this beautiful world with Alexa and James and to share them with the world everyday! How exciting! Yeah, there's things I can't do, but when I focus on the can-do's instead of the can't-do's I am so much happier, and surprisingly, those around me are happier, too!

Like Jack Donaghey said, "[The world] is made by those who do do . . . I do do."

With that in mind, here is My "Do Do" List to be completed by the end of August 2013 (some items crossover onto my 101 in 1001 List)!

• Make/Print/Laminate/Post a Really Awesome Schedule for Alexa
• Help Nick Graduate
• Move to New Mexico
• Have a “See Ya Later” Grilled Cheese Party with All Our Colorado Friends
• Stay Up Late Watching Old Movies with Nick
• Finish Reading 15 Books
• Read with Alexa Everyday
• Post on Blog Weekly
• Update the Blog’s Layout
• Leave Uplifting Notes Around Town
• Hang Out with Cousins before We Both Move
• Go to Library Weekly
• Attend City Carnival in June and July
• Make Small, Cute Going Away Gifts for My Friends
• Identify 101 Things that Make Me Smile and Photograph Them
• Be 100% Positive in All I Say for a Week
• Turn a Good Deed Daily for a Stranger for a Week
• Buy Flowers for Myself (and a friend) for No Reason
• Figure Out a Way to Exercise with 2 Kids
• Host a Game Night
• Ambush Nick with Water Balloons (you’ve been warned...)
• Take Nick to that One Indian Restaurant
• Go to that One Ice Cream Place in Louisville
• Play in Shaving Cream with Alexa
• Make a Sign to Welcome Suzy to Colorado from Her Mission
• Do Something Special for My Parents’ Birthdays While They’re in Town
• Make and Eat Jello Jigglers
• Visit a New Park
• Rediscover the Joy in Photography
• Get a Pedicure

Fashion Forward

Alexa has taken some very fashion forward risks recently which are both bold and challenging to the untrained eye...but there's genius here that may take time to see:

Wrapping Paper on Head

Mom's Socks over Pants

Mom's Tights over Face

Snow Cap Inside

Snow Cap Inside Coupled with Nakedness and a Sagging Diaper

Arm through Neck-Hole

Onesie on Legs

I Kinda Love Colorado

Nick left for work at 5:50am this morning and plans on putting in at least a 12.5 hour day, if not more to avoid going in to work tomorrow.

When we agreed to do graduate school this is what we signed up for -- occasional crazy days, typical 11-hour days, and a lot of vacation flexibility so long as it doesn't coincide with a conference or big publication. It's not easy all the time, but even if one had told me how lonely some periods of my life would feel I would have still agreed to it.

In fact, we maybe agreeing to it already. I'm not going to go into specifics, but Nick has/will be applying to eight (possibly nine) jobs this winter. He's headed out of town for a "job interview" Sunday and will be back Tuesday (quick trip). He's applying for jobs across the country leaving our family's future completely unpredictable (which is a real change from its completely predictable past).

I have done a lot of reflecting recently because of all this "Momy-time" I've been having recently, and the thing that surprises me the most about our time in Colorado is how much "it feels like home to me." I don't really know what I was expecting when we moved here, but living in Utah for school never felt like home, and I was there for 3 years. I always felt like a visitor saying "I'll be home [in Oregon] for Christmas" and now find myself saying "I'm so glad we'll be home [in Colorado] for Christmas."

One of the first pictures we took on our very first "let's explore!" walks in Colorado.

Maybe it's because so much of me has happened in the past 5.5 years. Thinking about where I was as a person when we moved here and where I am now just blows my mind! My 21-year old self would not have believed what I am capable of doing now or what I was capable of becoming.

Dolled Up in August 2007

Dolled Up in September 2012

(Geez! I figured how to pose for pics, fix my hair, trim my eyebrows, cover up zits, and wear clothes! Holy Cow!)

I wonder if that's what home is...maybe home is a place where you become the person you were always meant to be. That takes stretching, and stretching takes time. Don't get me wrong, I was stretched plenty in college, but places don't feel like home so much to me as the people that helped me through those times of stretching. Mostly Nick, but also my roommates and friends who held my hand and dried my tears through the flour gooping up in them (long story...okay, not that long: flour fights). In Utah it was the people I ended up missing, and here it's going to be the people but also the places where created our first real home.

 

One flour fight of many in college. So fun!

I kinda love Colorado, a lot more than I thought I would after 5.5 years. I'm going to really try to enjoy the snow this year.

Covetousness: The True Christmas Spirit

I don't know about the rest of you, but I am getting caught up in the Christmas spirit this year!

I want...I need...I wish I had...

That's the Christmas spirit, right?

Our financial situation is fine, we're just not going to get that Mercedes and move into that mansion that we've been planning on. Bummer, I know.

Nope, this year Alexa is getting the gifts and our family is headed to Oregon to see Grandmas and Grandpas and Aunts and Uncles and Cousins and Friends! There's definitely challenges to our parents living 5 miles apart, but I'm glad we get to make one trip and see everyone during the holidays!

So, my motto this year for Christmas has been this:

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." -Leonardo Da Vinci

I'm not sure that my heart has caught up with my brain on this quite yet, but there's still time! My mom gave me a lot of wonderful qualities (thanks for those, no thanks for the nose), but my favorite maybe that she and I are both dreamers. I've talked about this before, but at Christmas time it's so easy to get caught up in dreams, and some even decide to elevate their dreams above their finances.

We don't do that. Both Nick and I have had to sacrifice some of our immediate wants this year for something that we really want: financial stability.

Our recipe for a simple Christmas this year is this: we're filling each others' stockings for $20 or less, Alexa is getting new gifts from grandparents, birth-grand-parents, aunts and uncles, and from other gracious admirers. But Santa is playing it cool this year and is giving her second-hand and homemade gifts...and of course some candy. That's it.

I certainly admit to indulging the green-eyed monster of covetousness a few times too many this season, but I am the master of my fate, my happiness, and my finances!

It's going to be a wonderful Christmas season this year! So much to be grateful for and to look forward to and delicious delights to bake and share...more stuff would just clutter it up!

We're getting our tree tomorrow (YAY!) and I'm planning on finishing Alexa's stocking this weekend and will also figure out a stocking to make for The Sneetch as well. Can't forget about our next little character that will be coming into our home when the time is right! Maybe by next Christmas...

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a silly and smiley weekend!

Meetings and Partings

"Life is full of meetings and partings. That is the way of it."

-Bob Cratchit

(Meeting) This morning at 5:22am we gained a beautiful new niece, Lauren! So happy to have her here on earth and in our family!

(Parting) Last night, a young woman in our church congregation was killed in a car accident. She was 16 years old. She wasn't terribly active in the church, but a door was opening in her life and heart for Christ to enter in. I only hope that today she entered into the peace of her Savior, and that her family is finding peace in their hearts in this difficult time.

Days like today I find solace in thoughts of much wiser men than I, like William Wordsworth:

Hence in a season of calm weather Though inland far we be, Our Souls have sight of that immortal sea Which brought us hither, Can in a moment travel thither, And see the Children sport upon the shore, And hear the mighty waters rolling evermore. The Clouds that gather round the setting sun Do take a sober colouring from an eye That hath kept watch o'er man's mortality; Another race hath been, and other palms are won.

Thanks to the human heart by which we live,

Thanks to its tenderness, its joys, and fears,

To me the meanest flower that blows can give

Thoughts that do often lie too deep for tears

Maybe we should have a little more patience and hug our children a little tighter today. I know I will. Each day holds within it the potential for triumph and tragedy, and through it all we can turn to our Savior for love and peace.

Also, for those who are remembering the tragedies of 11 years ago, may peace be with you this day and always.

I know I promised the conclusion of Alexa's adoption story, but that will come tomorrow. Thanks for indulging me a bit today.

It Should Have Always Been

This summer Ray worked at a scout camp in Wyoming and along his way up and back down at the end of the summer he stopped by our place for a visit. Back in June he came and went to one of Alexa's swim practices with her and I, and a couple weeks ago he dropped by on his way home from camp with his son, Bjorn. He called that morning and things worked out for us to see them, which was so great! We went on a walk to the park and the creek near our home. We all really enjoyed ourselves!

After going down the slide together, sometimes things are a little crazy!

Creek near our home: so beautiful!

Creek near our home: so fun!

Ray and son Bjorn watching Alexa explore the creek

I think one of my favorite parts about open adoption is that over time it evolves into something that should have always been, but it took a little miracle to forge the friendship. Our relationship with Ray and Melissa is extremely casual and normal that I sometimes forget how extraordinary having a positive relationship and frequent interactions with our child's birth family is a pretty uncommon and uncomfortable idea for most other people.

Silly people. [Shakes her head disappointingly.]